Saturday, January 23, 2010

Don't quit quitting

I started smoking the summer I was 10. I was hanging around with a girl who was 4 years older than me and damn, she was cool. So I became cool, too. A rebel. A grown up, mature, really cool rebel.

For many years I didn’t consider it an addiction. I liked smoking. I wanted to smoke. Back in the days that I only had enough money to buy lunch or a pack of cigarettes, I would skip that meal without question.

I’m not sure how or why I changed my mind - I’m certain some non-smoking boy was involved - but at some point I realized I wasn’t so cool anymore. I won’t go into all of the times and all of the ways I tried to quit. Let me just say that I tried. And I failed. And I tried. And I failed.

I used to joke about how easy it was to quit smoking. I was exceptional at it - I had successfully quit smoking almost every Monday for years. Not starting again two days later that was the part I couldn’t master.

Actually, I did have periodic success. Sometimes it lasted weeks, sometimes months. But even then, if asked, I would say that I was a smoker who wasn’t currently smoking.

Then, in the fall of 2005, I knew - without a doubt - that I would never smoke again for the rest of my life.
I read a book called “The Easy Way to Quit Smoking.” No, I began reading the book. I was less than halfway through when I stopped reading and stopped smoking. One passage in this book changed my life.

This is what the author was saying leading up to that paragraph (I’m paraphrasing because I gave the book to a friend): If you consider the addiction a monster inside you, every time you smoke a cigarette, you are feeding the monster. Keeping him satisfied. Then he gets hungry again, so you feed him again. Over and over, the same thing is happening. Feed the monster, feed the craving, feed the need.

However. If you stop feeding him? He will die. It will hurt, you will feel as if a part of you is dying - and a part of you is dying. But it is the part of you that you want gone.

Eventually - I GUARANTEE YOU - eventually, he will be gone completely. You will think of him from time to time, you will miss him from time to time but he will be gone. As soon as you smoke one cigarette, he will be back. And you will have to start the whole process again.

Now, this is what he said that made the most sense to me: If one cigarette will bring that monster back, that’s the only cigarette you have to avoid.

I don’t think about never being able to smoke again, I don’t look at every cigarette in the world as something that will tempt me and undermine my will power. I am avoiding one cigarette. The first one. And that? I can do.

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If you’re trying to quit smoking right now, I highly recommend the book. “The Easy Way to Quit Smoking” has helped me, my brother, my BFF and my ex-boyfriend become non-smokers for life. Each of us said that there was one particular passage that spoke to us. And it was a different passage for each of us.

It is not magic. I also gave the book to a couple of people who did not quit. And, of course, I know lots of people who quit in other ways. You just have to find the way that works for you. It will still be a struggle, it will still be a challenge, but that monster will die if you let him. And when he is gone, you’ll know that you can do anything you set your mind to. And if you don’t get rid of him this time, trust that you will kill him eventually.

You only fail when you stop trying.

So DON’T QUIT QUITTING!

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